My Adventures to Whole Foods: 6/19

Every time I walk to Whole Foods something interesting happens. It’s only a block away but I observe the most fascinating scenarios… Or at least, I think that I do…

Here’s what happened within a matter of 3 minutes…

I almost got hit by 2 cars within a matter of inches.. again.

I got hit on by a 12 year old, a senior citizen, and an entire league of guys in pick up trucks-- all in less than 10 yards.

I watched an old dude with a greezy Jeri Curl use his underage/pre-pubescent daughter to run up on a woman so that he could hit on her.

What have I learned:

That men make me want to perform a Tubal Ligation on myself.

That if I were to procreate, I'd be very careful with whomever I decide to have a child with, let alone with whom I allow to supervise it.

If you hear your son hollering at girl from the beat seat, bitch slap him for me and teach the ignorant ass scrub some respect.

That just because it is flattering to get compliments, it’s another to feel and observe what I did today. Damn boys get your shit together… I guess it’s easier to degrade and objectify someone when you don’t actually see them as a person… and that might be okay in certain scenarios, just please don’t make it my problem. And I won’t make it yours.

And finally… I’d better walk with a bat and some protective gear, just in case someone actually decides to hit me.